James Thompson

M.A.M – MEN. AGAINST. MEGGINGS

So, what’s this all about? What’s Meggings? Why, as men, should we be against them? Well first off, Meggings are the male version of leggings.

As far as I can see they’re exactly the same as the ladies legging but the marketing geniuses have come up with a clever ploy to hood-wink all you confused males out there that could possibly wear these things!

They simply changed the L in leggings for an M, thus making them manlier. BRILLIANT! Argggghhh…. I can’t fucking take it anymore, what’s happening? Is it me? Am I just an ageing, out of date fool that should just shut up and watch as males are turned in to females in front of my very eyes?

The Meggings are a symbol. They’re a line in the sand. We, as men, have to say no more, it’s not happening! We’re not going to fall for it…NO!!!!

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MMA vs. BOXING

This old, tired, semi functioning, bed ridden ‘shitting where it lies’ debate has been given mouth to mouth and resurrected by a man that, funnily enough, fits the above description.

Tyson, real name Luke, called out Cain Velasquez ( The current UFC heavyweight champion) and any other fighter who’d ever put Mma gloves on, in what I think was an attempt to gain some kind of notoriety and get his name out in the States.

Now, I don’t want to go into this too much as I think covered it in my video (which is at the end of my blog), and verbally beating My Fury up is like taking candy from a baby with no arms, I.e. easy to do but you feel bad afterwards.

So instead I want to dissect the question: MMA VS. BOXING

I hate this question. To me it’s not even really a question. True, both are combat sports. True, Boxing is a large part of Mma, True, in both sports you have to be strong physically and mentally to compete but that’s where the similarities end.

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SHAWN TOMPKINS

I’m writing this blog about Shawn, a couple of years after his passing, because I’ve decided to write a book called Colossal Concerns: Tales from the gym and other colossal adventures.

As I started to plan these epic tales of Mma wonderment for your consumption, I sorted through the filing cabinet in my brain (Which is full) and selected the best stories that will both amuse and interest you.

Whilst recalling various episodes during my career for the book I arrived at the part where I trained at Randy Couture’s gym, Xtreme Couture, in Las Vegas back in 2008.

As I was cataloguing these stories, I arrived at ones with Shawn. As I relived these events I was hit with a flood of guilt. Why hadn’t I done a blog about him sooner!?!

Now, please don’t mistake me here, me and Shawn weren’t best buddies or anything like that but I got to know him a little during my stay in Vegas as he had little choice but to see me every day!

When I was training at Xtreme Couture I didn’t know a soul, apart from Jay White, who had taken pity on me and let me stay at his home and invade his and his family’s space for ten weeks!

While I was at this strange new gym I was doing my best not to seem intimated or out of place while sharing mat space with legends like Randy Couture, Wanderlei Silva, Heath Herring, Forrest Griffin, Grey Maynard, Tyson Griffin and Mike Pyle – to name drop a few. Not to mention the constant influx of the best fighters in the world that had casually ‘swung’ by.

I can’t tell you how invaluable it was to have a guy like Shawn Tompkins that, while not knowing me from Adam, took me under his wing and made me feel like part of his extended fight family.

When you experience something like this it really is comforting, especially as I didn’t know anyone there and was away from home, hence the guilt I expressed earlier about not having done this blog before.

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“SO, YOU WANT TO BE A FUCKING FIGHTER” ?

“So, you want to be a FUCKING FIGHTER” ?

To many who hear these words reverberating off of their eardrums from Mr. Dana White, the answer is an unequivocal “yes.” But since I’m not in that pressure cooker like these new fighters are and since I actually AM a fucking fighter, I took time to ponder what the question really means.

Nowadays, this question is being asked more and more. Why? Because the UFC is having more and more shows, which means more fighters are getting injured, which means more fighters are needing to step up on some short notice, causing Dana White to bark out the inevitable question. I’m going to look at both sides of this coin, and, since every case is different, I’m going to do my best to give you my humble opinion of what makes a fighter. So are you fucking ready? Ready for some fucking MMA knowledge bombs, motherfucker?

I apologize–I’ve got that all out of my system now.

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FREAKY MMA

Roll up, roll up, let your eyes feast greedily upon the wonders of man as warriors from around the globe in all manner of shapes and sizes are pitted upon each other using mind, body and soul in the ultimate form of combat, MMA. Where, from the ashes of battle only one true victor will emerge and be left standing. Roll up, roll up!

This is how I imagine the M.C. of a Carnival would sound selling the ‘freak show fights’ that we witness in MMA today. If you live in Japan then you get a lady from New Zealand with a crazy cool voice to do it. With Japanese Mma now struggling and the UFC not having adopted the kind of format that showcases the ‘freaks show fights’, it looks like the ‘freak show fight’ might be on it last (overly long) legs.

So this time on Colossal Concerns I want to give my views on whether this is a good or a bad thing. To answer this we have to delve into what a ‘freak show fight’ really is.

Now, this isn’t an easy question it’s like a freakily shaped onion, by that I mean it has many strange layers. So please join me while I take a closer look at what the ‘freak show fights’ are all about (clears throat) Roll up, roll up! Don’t be scared, pay your money at the door and prepare to enter the many faceted world of the ‘Freak Show’.

The ‘freak against freak’ fight

(Zulu vs. Butterbean)

Image

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ME, YOU & BUGGALOO

I was wondering which of the many topics I should delve into now that I’m free from the confines of writing strictly about mma. The one I have chosen didn’t spring to mind right away, which is strange as it is been something that has been on-going for six years, or so.

You are probably sat there reading this wondering what’s been happening for 6 years or so that I haven’t mentioned before and there really is no easy way to say this but I believe my cat is trying to kill me. There, I’ve said it.

Now, of course I’m writing this in a light hearted way but that doesn’t mean that the underlying issue isn’t true. Yes it’s funny that a three hundred plus pound MMA fighter (cage fighter) is scared of his cat, actually let’s not say scared as ‘scared’ is too strong a word, let’s go with ‘wary’. Before I justify my wariness for my cat, I feel that I need to explain who the protagonists are in all of this just so you get the clearest and most whole picture in your minds. So who are Me, you and Buggaloo?

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WHEN DOES BIG GET TOO BIG -The Dangers of the UFC

Before we go any further on this blog I feel I have to make this point. It’s sad that I have to make it but such is life huhumm (clears throat)… The UFC IS NOT MMA!!! The UFC IS AN ORGANISATION THAT SHOWCASES THE SPORT OF MMA. Simple!

Unless you’re trying to explain what Mma is to the uninitiated then those of you that call Mma ‘Ultimate Fighting’ or ‘Cage fighting’ or anything else that you think makes you sounds cool, edgy or extreme, need to please follow these instructions.

1. Please place your ineffective, useless head at the mouth of a doorway

2. Make sure the door is either heavy wood or thick steel.

3. Finally place your head in said doorway and continue to open and shut it with all the ferocity you can muster in a Vinnie Jones, Lock Stock & two smoking barrels sort of way.

If you’re having trouble with this then ask around and I’m willing to bet that there will be an army of people you’ve offended with your nonsensical & dim-witted ways that will be more than happy to smash what little contents there is contained in your head over the floor provided.

I can hear you saying to yourselves ‘what difference does it make if I call it Ultimate fighting/Cage fighting and not Mma, it’s only a term describing the same thing, what’s does it matter what words you use as long as people know what you’re on about?’. To you I would respond ‘calm yourselves down… the door will shortly be free for your use’!

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Do Women have a place in MMA?

Don’t worry ladies; we haven’t gone back to the fifties despite my rather dated and antagonistic title. A more fitting title would have been ‘how big will women’s mma get’? My answer to this would be ‘Massive’!

We’ve seen the sport of Mma sky rocket to new uncharted areas of growth so it’s easy to forget just how new the sport actually is; really it’s still in its infancy. Within the last five years women’s Mma has sky rocketed and thus, so has the quality and amount of women competing in the sport.

On a side note: Something that puzzles me is ‘how come women’s Mma is steadily growing and gathering pace whereas women’s boxing has been at a virtual standstill’?, and that’s being kind. I wonder if it’s because people don’t like to see woman solely punishing each other with punches and even though Mma is seen as brutal by some, there are more varied ways to win other than by a KO. Some will say it’s simply all a fad and women’s Mma (along with Mma in general) will shine bright and then will burn out shortly after, but if you look closely at who’s saying this you’ll find it’s mostly crusty old men who are all about “the sweet science “… Boxing, and so stuck in their crusty old ways they can only ever imagine women putting on gloves to clean. These boxing dinosaurs are nothing to be scared of, I suggest tolerating them like a bad smell – unpleasant to be around but it won’t kill you. They will fade out long before women’s Mma… That’s enough pensioner bashing, for now.

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Down, but far from out: Fred Ettish

With it being Easter, I figured you’d all be far too busy shovelling chocolate shaped eggs into your mouths to read. Having had some extra time to ponder what topic I’d like to tackle next, I settled not so much on a topic, but rather an MMA Fighter. “Of whom” I hear you ask “Silva, Wand, Fedor???” Well none of the above actually… I settled on a man named Fred Ettish. Now you’ll be forgiven for asking who the hell he is, but bear with me. Whilst I had witnessed Fred Ettish fight in the very beginning of the UFC I too was unaware of his story post UFC, up until recently.

After watching & reading about him, I managed to find the one emotion I still had in my body that hadn’t been deadened or hardened by life, and I was actually moved by his story. Also, with my last blog being about Traditional Martial Arts, I thought it followed on nicely from that topic and it shows that even if the Martial Art isn’t great, it doesn’t mean the person practising it can’t be.

(A quick note on my last blog. I forgot to mention some of the positive aspects of Traditional Martial Arts.. I.e. discipline and fitness for kids. Please forgive me, this sometimes happens when you get hit in the head for a living)…

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